Music of the Fears: I Wonder What the Team is Doing Tonight

I Wonder What the Team is Doing Tonight

(with apologies to Alan Lerner)

I know what you skeptics are thinking tonight,
As home in pajamas you ponder
All of you smiling in secret delight
You stare at our emails and wonder
The media’s leaning our way
But we still hear the blogosphere say:

“I wonder what the team is doing tonight?
What database are they misconstruing tonight?
The emails at the U have finally seen the light
They show how many tricks they used to cause fright
How go the mass deletions
Just before investigations
Are illegally politically prepared?”
Well, I’ll tell you what the team is doing tonight:
We’re scared!
We’re scared!

“You mean that a Team so skeptic-wary
Who tricked up the graphs to make them scary
Answers the phone in terror and distress?”
Oh yes!

“A Team who likes skeptics just to pick on
‘Cause they can spot our hockey stick-on
Faces the media petrified with fright?”
Right!

“You mean that appalling clamoring
That sounds like a hard drive hammering
Is merely deleting declines of degrees?”
Please!

You wonder what the Team is wishing tonight?
We’re wishing they weren’t successful fishing tonight!
What occupies our time while waiting for the ax?
We’re watching even friends now launching attacks

And oh, the Harry_Read_Me,
That said “fake the temps if need be”
That expose that we’ve been crooked, crude and dumb
Well, I’ll tell you what the Team is feeling tonight:
We’re numb!
We shake!
We quail! We quake!
And that’s what the Team is doing
Tonight.

===|==============/ Keith DeHavelle

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